GREAT article about Gay marriage and the Bible....

Brought to my attention by my friend Kris.....I'm actually considering picking up the bible and reading it. I'd like to be able to accurately defend what I believe is right and use the bible to argue MY points and throw them in the face of the right (or my grandma). Too many people are using what is supposed to be a book of faith and love to inspire hate and discrimination. If Jesus was real, I'm sure he's rolled over in his grave a million times by now.

http://www.newsweek.com/id/172653/page/1

It's you, not me....

Yeah, it IS you and not me. Cause I'm awesome. And even though it was your lame excuse, you ARE fucked up. And by the way, YOU ANSWERED MY AD!!!!!!! If you're soooo fucked up that I shouldn't want to date you, then don't answer ads that clearly state the the woman is looking for a relationship.

Oh, and calling all douchebags: If you don't want to date a girl and just "want to be friends"....you should make that clear to them, so they don't just think you're being a tool and not calling her.

Jesus H. Fucking Christ.....dating sucks monkey balls. Whatever.

The difference between a dude and a man.

Dude....whatever.

After 12 years of dating dudes, I'm ready to date a man. Now, you may be asking what the difference between a dude and a man is....aren't they the same thing? No, they are not. They couldn't be more different in fact. Let me explain.

When dating a dude, there are a few things to look out for:

1. Dudes usually have very little real relationship experience. They've usually dated "girls" as opposed to "women". (If I need to explain these differences, then we've really got problems). "Girls" put up with bullshit. "Women", by and large, do not. The dude/girl relationship usually ends when the dude has exhausted all his bullshit on a girl and thinks she's pathetic for dealing with it as long as she has. Even though this is what attracted the dude to the girl in the first place. Yeah, I know it doesn't make sense. It's not supposed to. These are dudes we're talking about.

2. Because of this lack of relationship experience, dudes also have a lack of dating etiquette. Even if a dude likes you, he needs to act "cool guy." "Cool guy" consists of not showing consistent interest in a woman. He believes that not coming out and expressing that he likes the woman and wants to spend time with her and get to know her makes him seem like a man. He is protecting his feelings. Because as everyone knows, feeling are for pussies....and fags. This is counterproductive. In the real world, a "cool guy" is someone who isn't afraid to just lay his feelings on the line. Dude will call and talk to you for several hours and express extreme interest in you on a Monday, but then not call again all week until say, Friday or Saturday and want to hang out that same night. This is a tactic devised to make you feel like you're "taking crazy pills." It confuses the woman. Monday's call gets her excited. "Yay, he likes me!" she thinks. But no call all week causes her to think, "Aww man, I thought he liked me. Darn." Then the call on the weekend is just plain unacceptable. Calling the day of to make plans is a complete and total lack of respect for the woman's time. Dude does this because he was hoping for something or someone better to come along all week. When he realizes that no one else likes him, he calls the woman. In most cases, she will acquiesce and go on a date with him. This sets an unhealthy precedent.

Now, I'm not one to think that a man has to do all the work in the dating phase of a relationhip. A woman should by all means, pick up the phone and call a man just as much as he calls her. But, when dating a Dude, the woman inevitably ends up doing all the calling. Again, we're back to the "crazy pills." A woman will eventually get sick of doing all the calling and give up. After not receiving any phone calls from Dude for a lengthy amount of time, she assumes he's not interested. This saddens her, but she moves on. Then, out of nowhere, Dude will call. This tactic is called "fucking retarded." He will ask why he hasn't heard from you in forever. You will reply, "well, you didn't call me either." He will come up with some lame excuse like he lost his cell phone or he thought you didn't like him anymore, or he thought you were mad at him for something. Ladies, do not fall for this seriously douchebag move!! It was designed to manipulate and confuse the woman. And, in almost 100% of the time, it works!

Now when dating a man, there are also a few things to look out for:

1. If the Man likes you, he'll call you. He won't wait a week and a half. He'll usually call within two days of meeting you to set up a date. This date is usually scheduled a good two to three days in advance. This tactic also shows a respect for your time. Ladies, please don't be alarmed by this bold move. His intentions are good at this point.

2. If the Man likes you, he will tell you. I know, this is the most shocking one of all. A Man expressing his feelings? Unheard of!! And probably gay! No, not gay, and not unheard of. It really happens.

3. There are also a lot of little, yet significant things to look out for. Such as being on time for dates, being nice to your friends, holding your hand in public...etc.

You may be asking, why are there such differences and why can't all Dudes be Men? Well, just as all Women are first Girls, all Men are first Dudes. Men usually become Men when as a Dude, they accidentally date a Woman who puts them in their place and explains to them why they are such a douchnozzle.

Also, it helps to have been in love and have your heart broken at least once. This goes for both girls and dudes. Experiencing this love and then pain gives you new perspective on how to treat people.

Life is too short to be strung along.....plus, Karma is a bitch.

Tucker Max and my sex life

As a woman, I'm not supposed to like this guy. He's a quintessential asshole. He's incredibly attractive and knows it, he drinks to excess that would probably kill most people and more importantly when he does drink (and doesn't for that matter), he has sex with all kinds of women and then treats them horribly. But....I would fuck him in a hot second. As I am an aspiring writer of my sexual conquests/weird love life and he is my hero for this reason, I would love to end up being one of his conquests and have a story titled after me on his website (tuckermax.com). This would be my shining day. Forget heaven or winning the lottery, I'd have some made up nickname derived from some physical attribute of mine or something stupid that I said....he'd fuck me, and then force me to leave through the window or puke on me or steal my clothes and I'd have to walk home naked. And then he'd write about it.

As I will do with so many of the guys that I've experienced really terrible sex with, who were just plain out of their fucking heads. Yes, I'll give them nicknames or just change their names altogether. But, my friends will know who they are...and more importantly....they know who they are.

Like the guy that didn't bother to tell me that the condom came off at some point during sex. And I found it days later.....when it finally came out of me. The name of this poor schmuck (who was also the worst lay EVER) will be changed, but if he reads it....he'll know. Oh, he'll know.

So, in conclusion...Tucker Max, if you are ever in Olympia, WA....I will totally do you. And I'll try my best to make it interesting enough to write about.

Oh, and check out his website tuckermax.com and read his book, "I hope they serve beer in hell" and then watch the movie version when it comes out in Spring 2009.

More Dan Savage/Gay Marriage

And yet again, Dan Savage shows his extreme mental superiority

D.L. Hughley is a fucking idiot. I have a real problem with any minority thinking they can discriminate against another minority...do they have no empathy??? Other minorities should be the FIRST in line behind the gays supporting their right to be treated equally under the eyes of the law.

I fucking LOVE San Savage!!!

Washington prisons settle lost penis case

Associated Press • Published November 18, 2008

SEATTLE – A Mason County man who lost his penis to flesh-eating bacteria in prison has won a $300,000 settlement from the Washington Department of Corrections.

The 61-year-old man, Charlie Manning, told The Seattle Times on Monday that he settled because he wants the ordeal to be over. The department said in a statement it settled to save the cost of litigation.

Manning was serving time in 2004 for threatening a neighbor. When he became ill at the Stafford Creek prison near Aberdeen it was diagnosed as a reaction to cold medicine.

By the time Manning was airlifted to a Seattle hospital with an internal abscess, doctors had to remove several pounds of flesh from his pelvic region.

Surgeons made a replacement penis with skin from his thigh.

Awesome....that's all I can say. Thoughts?

Pics of me as Sarah Palin

Like my crazy eyes?


The Maverick and her bitches. In case you can't read it, my sash says, "Miss Stupid Cunt Alaska."

Sarah Palin and downsie babies...

This is a video Josie took of me trying to downs out the baby doll I carried with me on Halloween this year, as I was of course the best Sarah Palin in Olympia, WA!!! It's hilarious and offensive.

Hallelujah! This is what I’m talking about people....

Posted November 15, 2008 | 06:12 PM (EST)

Geoffrey R. Stone

Democracy, Religion and Proposition 8

How can a free society reconcile the often competing values of democracy, religious liberty and the separation of church and state? This challenge was vividly illustrated by the recent controversy over California's Proposition 8, which forbade same-sex marriage.

In a democracy, the majority of citizens ordinarily may enact whatever laws they want. Some laws, however, are prohibited by the Constitution. For example, the majority of citizens may want a law denying African-Americans the right to vote or prohibiting Muslims from attending public schools, but such laws violate the Constitution.

Does Proposition 8 violate the Constitution? There are several arguments one might make for this position. One might argue that Proposition 8 discriminates against gays and lesbians in violation of the Equal Protection Clause. One might argue that Proposition 8 unconstitutionally limits the fundamental right to marry. One might argue that Proposition 8 violates the separation of church and state. It is this last argument that interests me.

Laws that violate the separation of church and state usually take one of two forms. Either they discriminate against certain religions ("Jews may not serve as jurors"), or they endorse particular religions ("school children must recite the Lord's Prayer"). Proposition 8 does not violate the principle of separation of church and state in either of these ways. It neither restricts religious freedom nor endorses religious expression.

What it does do, however, is to enact into law a particular religious belief. Indeed, despite invocations of tradition, morality and family values, it seems clear that the only honest explanation for Proposition 8 is religion. This is obvious not only from the extraordinary efforts undertaken by some religious groups to promote Proposition 8, but also from the very striking voting patterns revealed in the exit polls.

Proposition 8 was enacted by a vote of 52% to 48%. Those identifying themselves as Evangelicals, however, supported Proposition 8 by a margin of 81% to 19%, and those who say they attend church services weekly supported Proposition 8 by a vote of 84% to 16%. Non-Christians, by the way, opposed Proposition 8 by a margin 85% to 15% and those who do not attend church regularly opposed Proposition 8 by a vote of 83% to 17%.

What this tells us, quite strikingly, is that Proposition 8 was a highly successful effort of a particular religious group to conscript the power of the state to impose their religious beliefs on their fellow citizens, whether or not those citizens share those beliefs. This is a serious threat to a free society committed to the principle of separation of church and state.

The Framers of the American Constitution knew that throughout human history religious self-righteousness has caused intolerance, discrimination and injustice. They understood that religious self-righteousness is dangerous, divisive and destructive, and that it has led to untold ignorance and misery. It was for that reason that they embedded in our Constitution a fundamental commitment to the separation of church and state.

The Framers were not anti-religion. They understood that religion could help to nurture the public morality necessary to a self-governing society. But religion was to be fundamentally private. It was for the individual. It was not to intrude unduly into the political sphere.

But here's the rub: From a strictly legal perspective, it is next to impossible for courts to enforce the separation of church and state in the context of laws like Proposition 8. When a law does not directly restrict religious activity or expressly endorse religious expression, it is exceedingly difficult for courts to sort out the "real" motivations behind the law. As a consequence, courts are loath to invalidate laws on the ground that they enact a particular religious faith.

This does not end the inquiry, however. Courts also have difficulty in dealing with laws that do not expressly discriminate on the basis of race or religion or gender, but that were motivated by racial, religious or gender prejudice. But we know - as an essential part of our national character - that we as citizens should not support laws because they advance our discriminatory biases about race, religion, and gender. We know that it is un-American for us to enact laws because they implement our prejudices. We know that it is our responsibility to be tolerant, self-critical and introspective about our own values and beliefs and to strive to achieve our highest national aspirations.

The separation of church and state is one of those aspirations. Indeed, regardless of whether courts can intervene in this context, it is as un-American to violate the separation of church and state by using the power of the state to impose our religious beliefs on others as it is to use the power of the state to impose our discriminatory views of race, religion or gender on others.

This is the fundamental point that the religious advocates of Proposition 8 fail to comprehend. Like other citizens, they are free in our society to support laws because they believe those laws serve legitimate ends, including such values as tradition, general conceptions of morality, and family stability. But they are not free - not if they are to act as faithful American citizens - to impose their religious views on others. That is, quite simply, un-American.

This is not to say that individuals cannot attempt to persuade others freely to embrace and to act in accord with their religious beliefs. The First Amendment gives us virtually absolute protection to preach, proselytize and evangelize. But the fundamental point about religious liberty in the United States is that it is private. Christian Evangelicals have every right to try to persuade others to accept and abide by their beliefs. But they have no right - indeed, they violate the very spirit of the American Constitution - when they attempt to conscript the authority of the state to compel those who do not share their religious beliefs to act as if they do.

I love you grandma, but seriously....

...this is why I hate religion.

I received this retarded religious propaganda email from my dear grandma today. She knows I'm am NOT religious in any way, and she is. We respect each others beliefs for the most part, mostly by not discussing our opposing views. Knowing we'll never change each others minds (which I'm not even interested in doing to her), we agree to disagree. I love my grandma with all my heart and usually just hit delete when I get stuff like this from her. When I received this email today, I forwarded it to a couple friends saying, look at the crap my grandma just sent me. But then I had a thought. I don't send her emails about my beliefs, or non-beliefs as they are, I know that she would be offended and not appreciate them in the least. So I don't do it. Plus I'm not in the business of "converting" people to atheism. Those are my thoughts and beliefs and I recognize that everyone else in the world has theirs, and has a right to them. So, while she has the right to believe what she believes and I don't harass her about it or preach to her in anyway, why don't I get the same respect???? So, I wrote her an email asking her to stop sending me that stuff.

The difference between hard core Christians and Atheists or Agnostics in my opinion, is that alot or most Christians are NOT truly tolerant. They want everyone to believe what they believe. I want everyone to have their beliefs, whatever they may be, and keep them to themselves and only share when asked. And DON'T write your religious code into the laws of this country that govern EVERYBODY, not just the Christians.

So, the overall message of the email, which is below, is that the Christians having their right to express their beliefs taken away by left wing America. No, we don't want to take your right to express your beliefs away. We do want it to stay out of our courtrooms and schools. And BY LAW, you can't have them there in those two places anyway.

If you want the right to practice your religion, then I want the right to not have you try to force your religion on me. This country was founded on the basis of religious freedom, not Christianity. Religious freedom. You have it, why can't I??


Wow, I'm pissed. Sounds like I need a nap.

Here is the email she sent me, which I'm pretty sure Jesus wouldn't actually approve of. Oh, and I like how it ends with "Need I say more?":

The following is a poem written by Judge Roy Moore from Alabama . Judge Moore was sued by the ACLU for displaying the Ten Commandments in his courtroom foyer. He has been stripped of his judgeship and now they are trying to strip his right to practice law in Alabama ! The judge's poem sums it up quite well.

America the beautiful,
or so you used to be.
Land of the Pilgrims' pride;
I'm glad they'll never see.

Babies piled in dumpsters,
Abortion on demand,
Oh, sweet land of liberty;
your house is on the sand.

Our children wander aimlessly
poisoned by cocaine
choosing to indulge their lusts,
when God has said abstain

From sea to shining sea,
our Nation turns away
From the teaching of God's love
and a need to always pray

We've kept God in our
temples, how callous we have grown.
When earth is but His footstool,
and Heaven is His throne.

We've voted in a government
that's rotting at the core,
Appointing Godless Judges;
who throw reason out the door,

Too soft to place a killer
in a well deserved tomb,
But br ave enough to kill a baby
before he leaves the womb.

You think that God's not
angry, that our land's a moral slum?
How much longer will He wait
before His judgment comes?

How are we to face our God,
from Whom we cannot hide?
What then is left for us to do,
but stem this evil tide?

If we who are His children,
will humbly turn and pray;
Seek His holy face
and mend our evil way:

Then God will hear from Heaven;
and forgive us of our sins,
He'll heal our sickly land
and those who live within.

But, America the Beautiful,
If you don't - then you will see,
A sad but Holy God
withdraw His hand from Thee.

~~Judge Roy Moore~~

This says it all. May we all forward this message and offer our prayers for Judge Moore to be blessed and for America to wake up and realize what we need to do to keep OUR America the Beautiful.

Pass this on and let's lift Judge Moore up in Prayer. He has stood firm and needs our support.

IN GOD WE TRUST!

NEED I SAY MORE?????

This evil cruel world

From Feb 2008:

So, I went over to my grandma's house last night to visit for a minute. My cousin was there with his girlfriend and their new baby. I have MANY issues with this.

1. They named the poor child Miley Mae Maynard. Seriously.
2. My cousin is 24 years old, this is his THIRD child (the first two he's not allowed to see).
3. He's already been divorced from baby momma 1 (who is a crackhead and has abandoned aforementioned children and left them with her mother who does not allow my cousin to see them).
4. The current baby momma is 19 years old.
5. My cousin is socially retarded and cannot hold down a real job, although he as been for several months now (ever since he got shot in May, he's been able to get some perspective on life. Right.)

He doesn't deserve to have children for all the reasons above.

Hey retards! Just because you are physically able to procreate, doesn't mean you should!!!!!!!

This is why there is no god. The people who are the LAST ONES ON EARTH WHO SHOULD EVER RAISE CHILDREN are the ones popping them out. The ones who would actually raise a decent, hardworking, moral, contributing child are the ones who have to spend $20,000 on in vitro fertilization or adoption.

By the way, when you already have two children you can't see or support, wouldn't you invest in some condoms???? Just a thought….

And if you are a young woman dating a "man" who has two children he can't see or support, and doesn't have job, wouldn't you get on the pill??? Just another thought…..

I am utterly flabbergasted at the way this world works sometimes. I've always believed that there is a reason for everything. What possible reason can there be for three poor innocent children being brought into the world with absolutely no chance for success in their lives due to their lack of functioning parents?

Just an afterthought and to give some perspective on this situation, my cousin's father, my Uncle Mark passed away in 2003. He was an alcoholic who married a schizophrenic and they produced my cousin. Mark Jr. was passed back and forth between Missouri where his mother lived and my uncle here in Washington. He never got a proper education; he is dyslexic, ADD and ADHD, and CANNOT READ OR WRITE. I suspect he also has Asberger's, but nothing has been diagnosed. He was raised poorly and therefore has passed along that tradition of terrible parenting and bad choices. My uncle was a good man, but not meant to be a parent.

Why can't we all be born sterile and have to take a test at some point in order to be allowed to conceive???

Karma and Balls

From April 2008...

Well, for those of you who know me, you probably remember the infamous Brant. I posted a blog about him more than a year ago. I dated him for a short time, during which he couldn't get it up and showed personal pictures of me to mutual coworkers. I happened to have a picture of his dick, so in my eloquent blog I posted that pic plus the town he lived in and that no one should do him, cause he doesn't function. Then to top the whole thing off, I ended up receiving a phone call from his GIRLFRIEND that he was living with the whole time we were dating. Anyway....onto karma and balls.....

I had happy hour with some past coworkers tonight and one of those past coworkers shared a lovely story with me. Apparently Brant was involved in a bar fight this past weekend and in the process of getting his ass thoroughly kicked, his opponent kicked him in his balls. Quite hard I'm assuming because poor little Brant ended up in the hospital to HAVE ONE OF HIS BALLS REMOVED!!!!!!!!

If that isn't karma....I don' t know what is.

Is it bad that I'm happy???

I hate people that are happy.

Why is everyone getting married and having babies???? It's like an onslaught, my eyes and mind are being raped with the image of women in their wedding dresses and posing with their pregnant bellies and changing their myspace name to "Mrs. Douchenozzle". Like anyone fucking cares about your retarded baby, that quite frankly isn't as cute as you think he or she is. Plus, they'll probably end up gay or a tranny. You should be so proud. And, I know that you are super excited about having just married some douchebag that is a plumber or some equally degrading profession, but you're gonna get divorced in like 5 years. That's reality. And if you make it beyond those 5 years, you'll end up fat and covered in stretch marks from having four of the douche's babies while he's out fucking...me. Yes, me. You heard it. I'm the one married guys like to screw around with. Do you know why, faithful wives? Because I'm not you. And because I'll let a guy come on my face...but that's neither here nor there. Here's the cold hard truth, if you are truly happy and content with your life, do you need to parade it all over myspace? So that some meth head that you used to go to high school with 10 years ago can comment on your pics and act as if they are happy for you? In reality, they pity you because they get to do drugs and have sex and you don't. But don't worry, you can do that after you get divorced and your ex-spouse gets custody of your mentally challenged kids.

For the record, for those of you that know me, know that I do want to have kids and get married some day. That still remains. However, I do not plan to wipe my poopy business all over the myspace community if either of those things happen for me.

I know, myspace is stupid. I'm trying really hard to stop, but it's like crack.

Football Haters

Look, I get that you don't like football. Fine. I never used to until a couple of years ago. But, I do. So, I put a Seahawks screensaver on my computer, a Seahawks background on my myspace page...etc. I don't ask you to watch it with me, invite you to games, etc. So, if you don't like it, don't fucking look at my page!!! You may be one of my best friends, but it fucking bothers me when you give me shit about something that I genuinely love. Do I give you shit about the things you love? NO. So shut up.